Hotline Miami

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Hotline Miami on Steam

MSRP: $9.99

Platforms: Win, Mac, Linux, PS3, PS4, PSVita, Android

Release: 10/23/12

I want to start here talking about hype. Whereas for most folks, hype is a fine thing, a lovely thing even, whenever everyone around me starts talking about something being the most amazing, I try to tune out.  Once the hype train passes a certain station, there’s no way the reality is ever going to live up to the expectation. I waited years to watch Firefly, because I knew that no matter how good the show was (and it was good, but it wasn’t my all-time favorite sci-fi, or even my all-time favorite Joss Whedon), I was going to be disappointed because it did not, in fact, change my life.

In much the same way, I have put off playing Hotline Miami, because I knew there was no way the experience was going to be satisfying enough given all the accolades piled upon it.

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The tutorial makes it look (and feel) easy. This game is not easy. This game is frustratingly difficult if you don’t have amazing twitch reflexes, and let me tell you, my twitch reflexes leave much to be desired. Through long and arduous hours of practice, I’ve managed to get to the point where I can play a MOBA or two without completely embarrassing myself, and I’m afraid at my age, that’s as good as it’s going to get. But that means, for me, Hotline Miami is going to be like Dark Souls – just out of my reach. I mean, I can’t even sneak up on some dude in the bathroom. This does not bode well for me.

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I pushed through a lot – and I do mean a lot – of restarts to finish off this very first stage, only to die almost immediately upon reaching the second floor, and I knew this wasn’t going to be for me. I get it – I really do – the sound and the visuals and the absolute mayhem and violence; Hotline Miami has its appeal for a certain type of gamer. I understand how the game has been elevated to crazy cult classic status.

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Of course, none of that means that I have to play it. Given the limitations on my time, and more importantly, the limitations of my skill, I don’t feel the need to throw myself up against Hotline Miami until I manage to do everything just right and maybe get through it one painful level at a time.  I’m just not that type of gamer.

One thought on “Hotline Miami

  1. […] graphically, there are quite a few similarities to Hotline Miami, the play is completely different, and relies more on patience and planning than twitch skills, […]


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